roxy’s third birthday in nyc was a blast.  she did better than expected with all the excitement presented to her.  from playing at the cool park in unio.n square, reading books at the flagship b& n, watching skaters at bryan.t and rock.efeller, meeting a life-size elm.o and monster, dining at chat & che.w, scootering around the LES, brunching on donuts, bialys, and bagels (also in LES, obviously as that’s where you go for quality “circle bread”) with friends, to the long car ride and stop for pizza on the way home.  we feel like we could go there with her every weekend and she’d be open to it!  her favorite memory is “i high-fived an m.&m” which did actually happen at the giant candy store where there was yet another costume-clad character.

in other news, my mother emailed saying she respected our decision to separate from the family and red composed an appropriate response for me to send since i was pretty bent on sending her a piece of my mind.  red’s words did wonders as she quickly sent her first apology in my whole life.  she spared nothing and admitted crossing the line in great detail.  i wrote back thanking her.

red’s parents, who we haven’t spoken to in years after the blog invasion (where she sleuthed the pw to this blog off of red’s sister’s computer) and their evangelical warpath finally had them telling red that they felt loving their god was more important than loving their daughter (and that gay parenting was an abomination)…well, they have been on the path to reconciliation and have since joined PFLA.G, HR.C, and ACL.U and text/email red pretty constantly now.  while their egos might be slightly inflated with their new-found acceptance and personal growth, they emailed today asking if they could buy us a vacation and meet us at whichever destination so we could hug and make up (and so they can meet roxy).  hm, we’ll be giving that a good think.  they also told us the AC.LU wants to make a documentary about them and include us.  something something about them tooting-their-own-horn.  but still, it would be nice to have a big family again…

roxy is still in relapse and her protein is still leaking.  because she’s on the meds daily (we had the go-ahead to taper to every other day and then her readings shot up again), luckily, she isn’t retaining water.  the meds wreak havoc on her temperament but she’s comfortable and happy for the most part.  still, because we loathe dull moments around here, we’re on day 4 of bottomless potty-training.  the first day, we had two wet accidents (and then i remembered to roll up the rugs). the second day, no accidents.  the third day, red took her out for a mere hour and she pooped in her pants.  today we had some slight leakage but ran to the potty in time.  she cries and whines for her diapers once or twice a day but also is really proud of herself when she has success.  today, i fear she might be withholding poop but as she’s napping right now (with a diaper), i will soon find out.

we bought her some bo.b books in nyc and she’s blowing our minds with how quickly she’s caught on to phonics.  just two months ago she’d point at the television and scream for us to turn it on.  now we go DAYS without her even asking. i’ve also found great success in her attention span by cutting out street all together and sticking with mr. roger.s and the occasional poco.yo (in spanish).  she also couldn’t put one puzzle piece into it’s proper place just a short time ago.  now she has such an appetite for problem-solving and i almost get verklempt watching her progress!  i have created at least a dozen montessor.i activities for her and she’s tackling them all (pin-poking is the favorite this week).  despite all these successes, we have some concerns about her eyesight.  i told her new pediatrician at her 3 year checkup this week and got a referral.  she cannot name colors…ever.  remember, she learned uppercase/lowercase and the sounds they make in one week.  i know colors can come later but beyond naming, if i ask her to pick up an object on a similar colored background, she cannot see it.  i’ll be interested to hear what’s going on here.  we’ve even tried the cell phone colorblind apps…inconclusive.

we had a scheduled visit from our SW this morning…i haven’t mentioned her since last august or september.  usually we work with coconut, who is roxy’s sw.  but our social worker, DR, will visit once a month starting now that roxy is placed with us.  we learned that yes, a 51A was filed by bio-mom because of the black eye.  DR didn’t seem concerned in the least but it still stings.  we’re so fanatical about roxy not injuring herself and red feels bad enough about slipping on the stairs.  still, DR said we might not even get a call about it so not to worry…still, we would like to set the record straight!

here is roxy on her scooter in nyc (note: she still doesn’t know how to ride it).scoot


some storm

i’m happy to report that little roxy is actually little again.  in fact, we’re quite sure that she not only shed the four pounds she gained in one week, but lost a couple more on top of that.  she’s seemingly stuck in reverse as her face looks more gaunt by the hour!  but we’re fattening her back up to her regular weight as fast as we can with unlimited yogurt, almonds, and bread.  her doctors had expected a couple weeks before her urine read only trace amounts of protein but she’s made a miraculous recovery and we will immediately start tapering the heavy dose of meds she in on.

every night before bed, we put two cotton balls in her diaper and when she wakes up we insert the cotton into a huge syringe to squeeze a drop onto a dipstick – hopefully that process can end soon (and we’ll only continue when she catches another virus and we suspect a relapse).  it’s been amazing watching the medicine do it’s job though.  over the weekend she began soaking through diapers (when they’d been nearly dry for a week before).  needless to say, we’re back to potty-training.

behold!  her swollen belly and legs right before the flooding began…






so, court happened.  we are thrilled that roxy can remain in our care for at least another month (of course, hopefully forever)!  we were so anxious yesterday waiting to hear some news and this is the best of all possible outcomes.  we’ll have her for her third birthday!

roxy caught the cold red and i have had all week.  this is the first runny nose of hers that we’ve had to wipe!  luckily she’s in good spirits.  in another first (at least with us), i took her to the drive-thru car wash this morning.  it was so cute watching her head dart from side to side.

this evening we are picking red’s older sister up from the airport for a weekend visit.  we are so thrilled to introduce her to roxy, who has been pointing at “colorado” on the map for weeks in anticipation.

here she is reading one of her favorite books (appropriate title, huh?).